Honoring the Cycles

I’ve learned that identifying which cycle of life I predominantly find myself in, is one of the most profound ways, I can connect more deeply with my soul, what she’s asking of me and where she’d like me to place my attention and devotion. Just as all the elements are always intermingling throughout our being, so too are the cycles.

Birth, life, death and rebirth are not linear processes. They are a spiral, one always weaving into another. Sometimes inside an hour, a day, a month or years. However, I can usually feel one dominant cycle playing out.

A cycle of death, of dying, of grieving, of letting go, of resisting, clinging to a life, a relationship, a way of being that’s dying whether I like it or not. Working towards surrender, towards this all consuming mystery of what lies beyond the veil.

A cycle of Birth, feeling pregnant, cultivating, nourishing a new way of life, I sense is coming. Answering the call towards mothering myself, caring for my body, conserving my energy, feeding myself with love. Confronting fear of what’s to come, questioning my stamina and strength for the upcoming labor, yet also feeling joy, excitement, commitment to this new expression of myself.

A cycle of Life, feeling like an infant, vulnerable, often uncomfortable in this new way of being, all my senses; hyper activated. Fascinated with being in a body, learning, growing, planting seeds, tending the garden, putting one foot in front of the other, taking it one breath, one day at a time. Dancing in the sensual experience of it all. Really feeling all my feelings.

A Rebirth Cycle, rising from the ashes like a phoenix, having danced with all the elements, alchemized shadow into light, lead into gold. Getting my feet on the Earth, grounding, stabilizing, integrating, spreading my wings, taking flight into yet another mystery, reimagining my life with a new sense of empowerment I’d yet to recognize in myself, until now! Reborn, alive, having survived whatever initiation I just moved through. Perhaps disoriented but alive, in my body and deeply grateful to be so.

Readying myself to do it all over again, with love and care and devotion. Honoring another turn of the wheel.